Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Books: Fat Karma

I have to put together a class proposal for my seminary program at the Zen Center. This proposal won't necessarily be implemented, but its purpose is for us to show our understanding of issues we learned out in the leadership and ethics class series. Since I've been thinking about this fat karma stuff, I decided to check out this first book especially because Chozen Bays is a local teacher and because I'm thinking about food and fat in my Fat Karma series. Then the second book passed over my work desk, and I got excited by that. About the time I started looking at the first, I realized this could make a really neat class series, so I hurried up, skimmed the second, and finally read the third book, which excites me most of all.

I suspect others will find this an exciting class proposal as well, and it could very well turn into a class actually offered at the Zen Center. This challenges me, and scares me at the same time. This hot button topic will be sure to bring out advice, fear, and judgment from many participants...actually great for the presentation for seminary, as I'm supposed to address problematic situations we foresee could happen in our proposed class. Not so great for my comfort-level. Not only would I be challenging the cultural paradigm in a Zen setting, I would be questioning the wisdom of a beloved Zen teacher on a particular aspect of this topic, as you'll see below. The first is difficult enough, the second makes me fear being a Bad Zen Student. I worry that I would not have the grace to balance these delicate issues.

As far as designing that class, with some more studying of these books, I think the outline will fall into place. Plus, I need a name. I'm vacillating between "Food Karma and Mindful Eating" or "Body Karma and Mindful Eating" or "Food and Body Karma and Mindful Eating." I would appreciate any thoughts my readers have on that. The primary text would be "Mindful Eating" but I would bring much material from the other two books into play, as well as other fat activist resources, and my thoughts from the ongoing Fat Karma series.

Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat: How to Break Your Eat-repent-repeat Cycle Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat: How to Break Your Eat-Repent-Repeat Cycle by Michelle May

My rating: 4 of 5 stars
I didn't fully read, but skimmed this book. I saw enough to know I like what the author has to say. I found it problematic that the author did not appear to mention "Health at Every Size." Perhaps this is because she seems somewhat still concerned about weight, and using her method as a way to encourage weight loss.

She presents her method as self-discovered, yet all her messages were just like those as presented in "Health at Every Size." (I read that one just after skimming this.)

I liked the way she identified 3 ways people eat: instinctive eaters; overeaters; and restrictive eaters. The book is about finding that instinctive way of eating again, and putting away the worse than useless dieting cycle of eat-repent-repeat. She talks about taking charge, rather than control, and that no food is forbidden. This is all good, but it is just the same as found in "Health at Every Size," and without what I felt was a key ingredient. The author of HAES makes every effort to warn against turning food mindfulness into another way to restrict, and to diet. I didn't see that so much here.

Mindful Eating: A Guide to Rediscovering a Healthy and Joyful Relationship with FoodMindful Eating: A Guide to Rediscovering a Healthy and Joyful Relationship with Food by Jan Chozen Bays

My rating: 3 of 5 stars
I feel like I should like this book more because the author is a local and loved Zen teacher. I think the method of mindful eating is well-presented and a useful tool, but enlightened though she may be, Chozen Bays reveals her lack of need to confront fat karma.

In his foreword to the book, Jon Kabat-Zinn refers to "our disordered relationship to food and eating." I thought, wow, that's just what I've been saying. I think we have a societal eating disorder, and it just seems to be getting worse. Mindfulness practice applied to eating is very useful to get us back in touch with our bodies' true needs. It helps peel back and erase those disordered relationships.

Unfortunately, in my view Chozen Bays still buys into some of those disordered relationships. I found it slightly problematic that rather than enjoy her discovery of the tastiness of Krispy Kreme donuts, she treated it as a cancerous thought of sorts. On first encounter, she, as she viewed it, mindlessly gorged on them, then obsessed over them while she denied herself further indulgences. Her account of making a particular candy difficult to retrieve also seemed to participate in the control found in restrictive eating and diet culture. When she claimed a healthy respect for those of us who are fat because her partner made a joke about her size, and her clothes got a little tighter, it didn't sit well with me. This was participating in the disordered eating culture, not understanding it. She hasn't needed to experience a life in a fat body, and while I know her to be a compassionate Buddhist teacher, I would doubt she truly understands this karma.

Most problematic to me was her casual mention of a Mindful Eating workshop participant. This participant was taking the workshop in order to prepare herself for her necessarily changed eating style after her bariatric surgery. Like many physicians, Chozen Bays accepts the validity of this surgery, and gives no further comment. She, it seems to me, mindlessly accepts the cultural paradigm that fat is bad, so bad that it is ok to endorse a surgery that hinders the body's ability to function normally for the rest of a person's life. This is if it doesn't actually kill you.

While there are some messages in this book I would not want to endorse, especially the controlling aspect, I do like the detailed instruction on how to eat mindfully. For people who've been immersed in the diet culture that forces us to ignore our own signals of our bodies, this method brings you back to that body, mind, emotional, and spiritual awareness.

Health at Every Size: The Surprising Truth about Your Weight Health at Every Size: The Surprising Truth about Your Weight by Linda Bacon

My rating: 5 of 5 stars
I read this after reading "Eat What You Love, Love What You Eat." It made me like that other book less, because this one covered all found in the other, but this one came first, and this one helped explain why there were parts of "Eat What You Love" that I found a little problematic.

This author, with her little study that proved that dropping the issue of weight, and concentrating on self-esteem, self-acceptance, and learning to trust the signals of the body and the mind actually works better than a conventional diet to improve health factors, well, this author is a David to the Goliath giant of the weight loss industry.

I've read The Obesity Myth and Taking Up Space, among others. If there were one book I would recommend on getting over fat phobia and finding a true path to health, this would be it. (Though those are good to pick up too. Both are especially good for understanding how this whole fat/food issue has its roots in culture, not health.)

Recovery from the diet paradigm includes learning to listen to the body's signals of hunger and satiety, and this is covered very well. It also includes understanding the economic and the cultural forces involved in supporting the diet paradigm, and this book covers that as well. (funding and oversight of studies being heavily intertwined with the weight loss industry; agricultural subsidies driving the production of processed food)While the author sends us to her website for further support and information, this book can truly stand alone as a guide to recovering from the damage of the diet paradigm.

View all my reviews >>

Thursday, December 24, 2009

Happy Holidays

May all beings be happy, healthy, and loved.

Saturday, December 05, 2009

Slow Read: Swann's Way, Week 8, conclusion

In Search of Lost Time, Volume 1: Swann's Way by Marcel Proust
In Search of Lost Time: Volume 1, Swann's Way (Modern Library Classics) (v. 1)
by Marcel Proust, translated by Scott Moncrieff

Part Three: Place-Names: The Name

How much more individual still was the character that they assumed from being designated by names, names that were only for themselves, proper names such as people have. Words present to us little pictures of things, lucid and normal, like the pictures that are hung on the walls of schoolrooms to give children an illustration of what is meant by a carpenter's bench, a bird, an ant-hill; things chosen as typical of everything else of the same sort. But names present to us—of persons and of towns which they accustom us to regard as individual, as unique, like persons—a confused picture, which draws from the names, from the brightness or darkness of their sound...The name of Parma, one of the towns that I most longed to visit, after reading the Chartreuse, seeming to me compact and glossy, violet-tinted, soft, if anyone were to speak of such or such a house in Parma, in which I should be lodged, he would give me the pleasure of thinking that I was to inhabit a dwelling that was compact and glossy, violet-tinted, soft, and that bore no relation to the houses in any other town in Italy
Names are imbued with his impressed imagination from a few clues about that name. So yet again the name of the book looms significant. "Swann's Way" was about a place, a particular memory on a particular walk and the girl first encountered there, about Swann and his love, and a love significantly similar for that little girl. Yet these examples he has, Parma, Balbec, and so on, had such significance based on nothing but imagination and a hint or two of the reality. To put it in an extreme way, those loves could be said to be like that also.
All the time that I was away from Gilberte, I wanted to see her, because, having incessantly sought to form a mental picture of her, I was unable, in the end, to do so, and did not know exactly to what my love corresponded. Besides, she had never yet told me that she loved me. Far from it, she had often boasted that she knew other little boys whom she preferred to myself, that I was a good companion, with whom she was always willing to play, although I was too absent-minded, not attentive enough to the game. Moreover, she had often shewn signs of apparent coldness towards me, which might have shaken my faith that I was for her a creature different from the rest, had that faith been founded upon a love that Gilberte had felt for me, and not, as was the case, upon the love that I felt for her, which strengthened its resistance to the assaults of doubt by making it depend entirely upon the manner in which I was obliged, by an internal compulsion, to think of Gilberte.
A love like Swann' that Swann's way?

But at the period when I was in love with Gilberte, I still believed that Love did really exist, apart from ourselves; that, allowing us, at the most, to surmount the obstacles in our way, it offered us its blessings in an order in which we were not free to make the least alteration; it seemed to me that if I had, on my own initiative, substituted for the sweetness of a confession a pretence of indifference, I should not only have been depriving myself of one of the joys of which I had most often dreamed, I should have been fabricating, of my own free will, a love that was artificial and without value, that bore no relation to the truth, whose mysterious and foreordained ways I should thus have been declining to follow.
Suddenly I would stop, in alarm. I had realised that, if I was to receive a letter from Gilberte, it could not, in any case, be this letter, since it was I myself who had just composed it. And from that moment I would strive to keep my thoughts clear of the words which I should have liked her to write to me, from fear lest, by first selecting them myself, I should be excluding just those identical words,—the dearest, the most desired—from the field of possible events.
There is an effort to resist the relentless track, but it is fairly futile.
They would ask one another, "Who is she?", or sometimes would interrogate a passing stranger, or would make a mental note of how she was dressed so as to fix her identity, later, in the mind of a friend better informed than themselves, who would at once enlighten them. Another pair, half-stopping in their walk, would exchange: "You know who that is? Mme. Swann! That conveys nothing to you? Odette de Crecy, then?" "Odette de Crecy! Why, I thought as much. Those great, sad eyes... But I say, you know, she can't be as young as she was once, eh? I remember, I had her on the day that MacMahon went."
I suspected Mme. Swann might be Odette, but the time frames have been murky, and I thought also it might be possible Swann had recovered his love addiction and moved on to someone else. I find myself wondering, was this supposed to be a great love story, or a tragic one? When Odette was losing her figure suddenly, was she pregnant? If so, whose baby was Gilberte? Did Swann then marry her out of chivalry? Did his love finally win her over after he'd finally felt over her, and her baby was legitimately conceived? I suspect now there are all kinds of code words and phrases going on that are no longer used so I didn't catch them.

I further wonder, was it in the very giving up of his love that Swann was hooked? Was it then that Odette said the little thing that folded him in again, as to an addiction to a pain without which he'd no longer have a clear identity?

Related to the Celtic belief he sited, the narrator felt the past could not be recaptured with volition. Only if we chanced upon some link it might open back up to us. So this whole book, a chance re-awakening? And in that unfolding blooms larger and more vividly perhaps, full of romantic wishes.

On the Bois de Boulogne, seeing the people strolling there, the elegance of Mme. Swann and those days, lost:
They were just women, in whose elegance I had no belief, and whose clothes seemed to me unimportant. But when a belief vanishes, there survives it—more and more ardently, so as to cloak the absence of the power, now lost to us, of imparting reality to new phenomena—an idolatrous attachment to the old things which our belief in them did once animate, as if it was in that belief and not in ourselves that the divine spark resided, and as if our present incredulity had a contingent cause—the death of the gods.
Is he saying that we create the divine spark through our creative memory?
the end:
...helped me to understand how paradoxical it is to seek in reality for the pictures that are stored in one's memory, which must inevitably lose the charm that comes to them from memory itself and from their not being apprehended by the senses. The reality that I had known no longer existed. It sufficed that Mme. Swann did not appear, in the same attire and at the same moment, for the whole avenue to be altered. The places that we have known belong now only to the little world of space on which we map them for our own convenience. None of them was ever more than a thin slice, held between the contiguous impressions that composed our life at that time; remembrance of a particular form is but regret for a particular moment; and houses, roads, avenues are as fugitive, alas, as the years.

Previous posts:
Week 1
Week 2
Week 3
Week 4
Weeks 5 and 6
Week 7